There we go, I'm now 30 years old.

New year, new job. Old quotes... Today I care not, I worry not and have no intention of making any sense. My words shall come in any order I find it coming and without any special meaning at all. So, be a kind reader and play along if you will.

"Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose." It's been some 15 years since I read that phrase for the first time, and it still rings very true to my ears.

And like Paul Atreides said, "I will not fear, fear is the mind-killer", let another thirty years come by, then I'll look back to it's path. Only I will remain.

As Roland of Gilead said, and as I've repeated many many times. "I have not forgotten the face of my father."

Oh, and by the way... I hope that when I reach the top of the Dark Tower, it doesn't send me back to the desert like it did to Roland.

Gotta find some new books to read, or maybe re-read some old ones :)

Happy birthday to me! :D
A friend from my work got kidney stones... Time to open an exception on my blog and post in portuguese, to honor him. (Dark humour)

No meio do caminho tinha uma pedra
tinha uma pedra no meio do caminho
tinha uma pedra
no meio do caminho tinha uma pedra.

Nunca me esquecerei desse acontecimento
na vida de minhas retinas tão fatigadas.
Nunca me esquecerei que no meio do caminho
tinha uma pedra
tinha uma pedra no meio do caminho
no meio do caminho tinha uma pedra
Some days you wake up not knowing why you're here, some days you want to forget what life is all about. Some days you just want to be in bed waiting for things to happen, you watching life happening and doing nothing about it...

Yeah, my mood ain't great today. Anyway, here's a little lyric of one of my favorite songs:

Some days are dry, some days are leaky
Some days come clean, other days are sneaky
Some days take less, but most days take more
Some slip through your fingers and onto the floor
Some days you're quick, but most days you're speedy
Some days you use more force than is necessary
Some days just drop in on us
Some days are better than others

Some days it all adds up
And what you got is not enough
Some days are better than others

Some days are slippy, other days sloppy
Some days you can't stand the sight of a puppy
Your skin is white but you think you're a brother
Some days are better than others

Some days you wake up with her complaining
Some sunny days you wish it was raining
Some days are sulky, some days have a grin
And some days have bouncers and won't let you in

Some days you hear a voice
Taking you to another place
Some days are better than others

Some days are honest, some days are not
Some days you're thankful for what you've got
Some days you wake up in the army
And some days it's the enemy

Some days are work, most days you're lazy
Some days you feel like a bit of a baby
Lookin' for Jesus and His mother
Some days are better than others

Some days you feel ahead
You're making sense of what she said
Some days are better than others

Some days you hear a voice
Taking you to another place
Some days are better than others
Nostalgia time!

Windows 3.0 was launched in 1990! And today sites over the Net reported that MS finally stopped licensing Win3.x... Of course this is not what The Log of Eternal Worries is about.

I just remembered that when I was a kid, back in 1990 give or add a year or two, I created my first BASIC programs, silly things like

10 PRINT Digite seu nome
20 PRINT Idiota, nao sabe nem seu nome! Tente novamente!
30 GOTO 10

That means some 18 years I got into this wild ride of technology... If you discard when I was even younger and I went to moms office to play blackjack, poker and stunts on the accounting PC.

Maybe those days shaped my childhood dreams, well, maybe this is fate playing its greatest prank on me... Anyway, I hope your job today is what you dreamed as a child. That's what Nostalgia is about.
Shitty things happen sometimes. Like someone shitting in your head leaving you to clean up the mess, driving you nuts in the process.

Damn, just hate being told to act like a sheep. To be told to simply walk around the rock... But anyway that's one way of dealing with (brainless) rocks. Just walk around it and keep going. When you look back, the rock is smaller and smaller, you're far down the road, and the useless rock is still there, at the same place, doing exactly the same thing. (Nothing, of course. What does a rock do?)
I sometimes wonder what comes after life. Yeah, death alright, but is there afterlife? Is it paradise? Do we queue on line again to be born as an animal or plant, based on our actions?

In my wildest theories... And I warned you this is a wild theory, I believe that everyone around me that dies simply die and disappear, their only meaning in life is to teach me something. Then you wonder, what happens when I die? Well, when the day comes that I die, everything will die with me. Yes, like the game name, The World Ends With You. I don't mean you will be living. Not at all. I'll die and the game is over. The lesson is learned. Whatever "I" was thinking when "I" decided to create this huge thing called reality will end and "I" will probably wonder what to do next. Which inevitably means "I"'ll rerun reality again, but put "myself" on another perspective, which means, of course, someone else.

As I told you before. It is one my wildest theories. The Life is at whole, a simple game of perspective. You and I, we're all the same. Maybe you cannot connect to the quintessential link that exists between everything... but I believe I glimpsed it, in my mind's eye. It is crazy, pointless and infinite. It won't cease and quite frankly, I like it the way it is. Let fiction be the realm of nightmares come true.

(No, I'm not high on any drug, legal or illegal. But my friend's death got my imagination on a wild spin, let this be my way of honoring him).
To be able to dream is great. To make plans is awesome. But when you cannot count on someone sharing your dreams... Life becomes a nightmare.

I almost erased my previous post. But that isn't life.

There's no deleting old posts, there's no undo.
I just had the perfect idea for a short vacation near to our 8th year together.

8 is a magic number, it means a lot for us. The symbol is so strong I can draw inumerous meanings of it.

We're opposites. Complete different universes coming together.

By the way, is it my imagination, or being awake for +20h straight is making me a bit delusional? Anyway I know now the surprise that is coming for my love on our next celebration for being together.

Maybe I'm a bit gray most of the time. But I got my moments. That's for sure.
Time is moving fast these days.

I got a new dog, perfect gift for me and Jú. It's name is Pietra, I know, it's not a dog's name, but it came with a name, who am I to change the name of a living thing?

This isn't the happy dog owner blog, though. This is the Log of Eternal Worries. So I must ask, how can someone understand that sometimes, when you think that everyone around you has become enemies, that it's not the world that is full of enemies, but simply, you're fighting yourself. Damn, late night philosophy makes my english skills fail miserably.

Lemme try again: If you believe that everybody around you is your enemy, think again. You are your worst enemy.

I like to think that I flow with Tao. If you see an enemy in me, an enemy I will be. If you see a friend in me, you have all my friendship.

Just remembered a good quote now: "Easy to forgive, hard to forget", something like that. Great thought to go to bed.
BOFH rocks!

Look at this:

"The 'great' thing about crap engineers is that they don't let something like not knowing anything about the product hamper them in any way. They're quite prepared to lift the cover on something, pull the memory out, hold the memory in their mouth while they bend a couple of heatsinks out of the way looking for a loose wire, shove the memory back in the slot, reseat it with a small amount of pressure, a medium amount of pressure, a large amount of pressure, then realise it's in the wrong way and repeat the pressure install method, shut the cover then realise they've been working on the wrong machine the whole time - and maybe they should have turned the power off first..."

Perfect for a fortune cookie. :)
Last night I had again one of my most pleasant dreams... Of flying!

That's almost the best type of dream I can have (think for yourself what's the best one).

I did a little google on it. Lucid Dreaming! It's been ages since I recall having lucid dreams (at least, of the sort that scared me to hell), and I was trying to remember... I've had a lot of flying dreams lately. I gotta tell you, it's one of the best feelings I have when dreaming.

I cannot totally direct my flying, I know though that I'm moving faster, gliding and that I can move just by thinking... like levitating. It's weird, I know. And the curious thing: I feel like I remembered how to fly. It seems that as soon as I wake up, though, I forget how, unfortunately. But I feel weightless, and though the dreamworld is somewhat delimited in paths, I know I'm moving a lot faster than other people.

I wished I could control it more... not sure what is the use for that, but it's a really cool way to have fun.
The world ends with you!

Yes, I'm a lazy poster... but I gotta tell you. This is the best game I've played recently. And the best Nintendo DS game I've ever played... Not that I played many games in the DS... but this one is the best.

The story is so tuned to my mind and beliefs, it's hard to believe, but it is.

I hope to see more games in the franchise...

Now returning to some eternal worries... Life goes on. :D
In 2008 I will complete 3 decades.

According to some specialists, it means I have about 10, 15 years of good work ahead, then some more years reaping results, until I retire, in about some 30 years at least.

I've been working since I was 14, that's almost 16 years of work already. Although I got very little financially from all these years, I believe I learned a way more a lot of people ever learn in their whole lives.

I know this sounds a bit arrogant. It is not meant to be. What I know won't get me rich any soon, neither will give me superpowers... perhaps I live a better life than a lot of people, yet I don't enjoy a lot of things a lot of people do.

Getting to the point of this post. What you know isn't enough to get you where you want. I know this now. Some choices I kinda regret but I won't turn back. I will do the best I can with what I have now and wait to see where it will take me.

There are other worlds than this, and in good time I'll have another chance.

(sorry for the dark mood)